I knew we would put an offer on our house even before I saw it.  Not because it was my dream home or in my dream location.  I knew it because the universe told me.  No, I haven’t a run in with Heaven’s Gate or Ayahuasca.  Hear me out.  Not long after we moved to Boone an acquaintance from Ohio posted a link of a house in the mountains on her husband’s Facebook page.  Why you ask?  Hell if I know.  I clicked the link, looked at the house.  It was adorable, but not perfect.  I moved on.

A year later when we began our home search I kept thinking about that house.  I asked our realtor the beautiful and amazingly talented (really pushing for that raise) Susan Chaney to check on it.  It sold.  I was oddly heartbroken.

Then one Friday night we were heading home from dinner with friends.  I was neurotically updating Zillow to get the newest listings.  Wouldn’t you know, my house was back on the market?  I call Susan at 10pm on Friday night (she loves that!) and asked her politely (aka demanded) that she get me in the house.  We scheduled a showing for Sunday.

On Saturday my family went to a park about a half hour away from our future house.  The townhouse we were renting had a showing that day.  Kids ran over to us at the park and started playing with our dog. Their mom asked if we would ever get a second dog.  I told her we were house hunting, but would consider it once we were settled.  She told me the home she was renting just went on the market, but it was far away.  She then rolled her eyes and said she needed to clean it for the first showing the following day.  We put the pieces together and it turns out we were the showing.

Fast forward a few months.  We get the keys to our new home!  It was so exciting.  My dear friend came over and helped me rip out carpet and 100,000 staples.  Her husband helped put in new flooring.  Other friends came over for a painting party.  We hired an amazing carpenter to finish our basement and build an office for my husband. Life was grand.

Until I realized we knew nothing about remodeling.  What started with carpet removal, turned into trim removal.  Once the trim was removed we were like “Oh man, these doors are gross. We should replace them while we’re at it.”  We tore off all of the interior doors and threw them off the deck.  ALL of the doors.  We took some measurements and went on our merry way to a large chain home improvement store to pick up new ones.

We found our way to the door aisle and checked them out.  They were all standard.  Who wants standard?! While my husband was calculating the cost I picked up a special order catalog.  And would you know I saw the doors of my dreams!  I didn’t even know I could love doors until I saw these.  I snuck away and asked the door dude how long the wait would be.  He told me three weeks, but sometimes it’s four.  That sounded totally reasonable to me since we weren’t moving in for two weeks anyway.  An hour and a half later we had 12 gorgeous doors ordered and a lot less money.  We skipped out of the store with smiles on our faces.

Fast forward two weeks.  We’ve moved into The House with No Privacy.  The carpenter and his team have started work on the basement.  My husband has his home office set up in an upstairs bedroom.  My kid was home for the summer.  Our sweet old dog had a hard time adjusting and barked at absolutely everything and everyone.  It was CHAOS.  But I kept my cool, the doors were going to arrive soon. Everything would be more manageable when the doors came.

It was the big day.  I made sure we were the first delivery in the morning. The truck arrives and the doors opened.  I was so excited I couldn’t contain myself.  They began to unload and that’s when I caught my first glimpse of the wrong doors.  WRONG DOORS.  It was devastating.  I took a moment, talked to my husband, talked to our carpenter, took some deep breaths and sent them back to the store.  It was just a mistake and it was a luxury to have this problem.  I found my Zen place and headed to the large chain home improvement store to find a solution.  I walked back to the door department, spoke with a manager, and began the process of reordering the doors.  We had to wait four more weeks.

The next month sucked. Seriously. I tried to keep things in perspective, but when your house is full of construction, kids and animals and you have no way to manage noise to avoid disruption to conference calls it’s miserable.  Anything that needed to be done in the bathroom that I didn’t want to share with others had to be done before 7am or after 5pm.  I did manage to find a way to use the top floor bathroom.  I mastered the “squat quickly, don’t sit, panicky peeing in a rest area” move. My quads were in the better shape than an Olympic speed skater.  I tried my best to stay distracted which was easy enough with managing a construction project and organizing playdates.

Finally, the day came.  I took a shower before construction crews arrived at my house like I did every day cause, ya know, no doors.  On went my nicest dress and my grandma’s pearls, I blew up balloons, and set out a lunch meat platter.  I wanted the doors to know they were home. The truck rolled up, doors opened and you got it. WRONG DOORS AGAIN.  I lost my shitakes.  I lost the ability to speak and my body shook violently.  Removing myself from the situation was the only option. I turned around, went inside, and held onto the kitchen counter and took deep breaths.  I sent the doors back, got in my car, and headed straight to the large chain home improvement store.  This is where things got ugly.  I requested to speak with the general manager and when he walked up and introduced himself I began sobbing, right there in the front of large chain home improvement store. Loud, ugly, hysterical crying.  The kind manager placed his hand on my back and guided me to the back of the store.  It was like a scene from a funeral.

So, three months and a huge refund later we had our doors.  A year and a half later I can look at them without a feeling of rage.  The door story is a thing of the past and when I ran into the manager of large chain home improvement store this weekend I chuckled and shrugged off the door incident like it was no big deal.  I’m sure he was fishing around in his pocket for a can of mace, but he played it cool.  I know we were beginners and a lot of lessons were learned, but I suppose the moral of the story is remodeling is not for the faint of heart. Remember the old saying, “when a trashy old door no longer closes, be sure your adorable new craftsman style door is delivered and opens.”

I’ve covered 3,000 miles during road trips in the past four weeks. The majority of the miles were covered with my husband, son, and dog. Due to motion sickness and what some may call “control issues” historically I’ve been the family driver.  I’m not sure what happened to cause me to loosen up a bit, but this change in attitude and newly found motion sickness medicine has made me quite comfortable with riding shotgun and left plenty of time for reflection.

My first road trip memories involve my dad behind the wheel.  He was militant about making good time.  There were scheduled bathroom stops and scarfing down fast food in the car.  Anything that caused us to slow down was seen as a major annoyance.  This includes many, MANY run-ins with radar guns and a college fund amount of money in speeding tickets.  The most vivid memory I have of adventures with my dad behind the wheel is when a bird collided with the windshield of our Volkswagen Rabbit.  My father refused to stop even though his vision was completely compromised.  He drove the entire length of the state of Florida with his head hanging out the window like a Labrador because he refused to stop.

As a single person I went on a lot of solo road trips. For various reasons I don’t remember the majority of them.  I’m fairly certain I’ve done my best to forget those years of freedom to preserve my current mental health.  I do remember being so bored driving through Nebraska that I ate an entire pound of Twizzlers. I was sure I would be found on the side of the road slumped over the steering wheel with a look of shame on my face and cornfields as the backdrop.

Now the majority of my adventures include a kid, sometimes a husband and dog.  The first time I drove a long distance alone with my son was fantastic. That was until we hit Baltimore rush hour traffic. For those of you who don’t know, Baltimore rush hour is the absolute worst. Imagine driving on a road packed full of blindfolded, angry drivers.  That’s what it’s like.  Since I was trying to “make good time” I ignored the early signs of nature calling.  The combination of the crazy drivers plus a full bladder was almost too much to take. And then my two year old learned how to unfasten his car seat all on his own.  We made it to our destination safely, but I’m pretty sure I shaved years off of my life during the last 45 minutes of that drive.

A few weeks ago my family and I drove the entire span of Florida. It brought back memories of the bird in the windshield incident and reminded me to relax and enjoy the time together.  It also caused me to briefly long for a powder blue Volkswagen Rabbit.  Lucky for me a friend gave me a the best road trip pro tip before our recent journey. He said that when a bathroom is needed to stop at a fancy hotel, walk in with authority, don’t make eye contact, and beeline for the bathroom.  It’s guaranteed to be cleaner than a truck stop.  If you’re feeling extra confident grab a cookie from the lobby.  Genius.

What are your favorite road trip stories and tips?  Please share something humorous! Trump has taken my funny.

I love my home. Every single thing about it. I deliberately chose the paint colors to be soothing and neutral to keep from competing with the natural beauty through the picture windows.  Its clutter-free because I’m a strong believer in a clean home helps with a calm mind. I fancied it a Zen mountain retreat until this past fall. That’s when a neighbor who owns land next to my home dropped off 15 goats and 2 sheep dogs. The dogs bark incessantly. Now I dream of selling my home. The only space that feels peaceful is my deck after yelling empty threats to the dogs through the woods.  Then it’s back inside to my den of blood boiling anger. Sleepless nights, infuriating days. I’m losing it.

This isn’t my first time barking up the difficult neighbor tree.  Our previous experience in home-ownership was in the suburbs of the Midwest. Across the street we had a meticulous retired school bus driver.  She had the most beautiful yard that I’ve ever seen, she invested a significant amount of time making it just right.  Unfortunately, for my family, she did yard work in a bathing suit.  Or on one extra special day she wore a bathing suit cover up with nothing on underneath. And bending at the knees wasn’t her strong suit.

To the right of us was a family with three children.  We would frequently find the oldest kid sitting in our car in the driveway, or standing in our yard staring at the front door while sipping on a Monster Energy drink. Every family member gave their opinions freely, but Monster (age 10) always added a mild insult. One day I opened the front door to find him on the other side. Here is how the conversation went:

Monster, “Where are you going?”

Me, “Target.”

Monster, “What are you buying.”

Me, “Clothes.”

Monster, “For the baby?”

Me, “No.”

Monster, “I hope it’s for you. I was just thinking that you really need some new clothes.”

Directly to the left of our home was a revolving door rental. Over the years we saw a diaper wearing toddler launching a bottle rockets in the driveway and a bird left in a cage on the back porch that would yell at us. They would park three cars in yard instead of the two car garage or extra large driveway.

One day after a storm Monster’s mom sent a text saying, “Have you looked outside?” Never good.  A tree in yard of the rental house lost a branch and went straight through the windshield of my new car.  That was frustrating, but not as upsetting as what happened during a storm six months later. After a hearing a loud crash we found a dead tree from the revolving door rental had fallen straight through our house.  I could go on, but I’d like to save some material for the book I’m going to write about that charming neighborhood.

We’ve gone from the ‘burbs to the Blue Ridge mountains.  We still have neighbors but there’s just more land between houses.  I have one neighbor that I love dearly. She always seems to call and ask if I want to go for a quick walk at just the right time. She gives me homemade baked goods and watches my dog when I go out of town. We carpool to school and help with each others kids.  We respect each others privacy and we’ve always got each others back.

Let’s all strive to be that type of neighbor. Aside from being sure to wear underpants while doing yard work and keeping your dogs from barking endlessly here are more neighborly tips:

Try to keep outside of your home tidy.  Your neighbors have to look at it every day.

Make sure you return items that you’ve borrowed in the same condition and say thank you.

Invite your neighbors to your house for brunch or a BBQ.

Clean up after your pet and don’t let them wander freely.  I promise you that not everyone loves Fluffy.

Avoid leaving holiday decorations up year round.

Absolutely do not be nosy and peek through the blinds.  It’s super creepy and probably illegal.

Did you hear that it snowed in North Carolina this weekend?  Charlotte saw a dusting of snow, followed by freezing rain and sleet.  Hickory got around 5 inches of snow and the High Country got who the heck knows how much.

Some people lost their minds before the snow started.  Buying all the bread and milk at Harris Teeter for their milk sandwiches.  One person I know was so overwhelmed with excitement that she left her sack o’ meat at Food Lion (name starts with Susan and ends with Chaney). But I kept my cool. Snow, awesome. Now that I’ve been in my house for 72 hours I’m singing a different tune. Showering is no longer a priority, a triple word score has become a thrill, and leaving the house either needs to happen today or never again.

Now all I can do is prepare for the next Snowmageddon. Facebook is telling me that a lot of people made it to Sugar, Beech and App Ski Mountain this weekend.  Or they went cross country skiing near the Blue Ridge Parkway. All of these friends were smart enough to buy a house in town. For those of us insisting on living in the sticks it isn’t quite as simple.  Next time I’m snowed in I’m going to clean out my closet, do YouTube yoga, wipe down all of my cabinets, read more, and online shop less. I swear!

I’m also going to be prepared to entertain my stir crazy kid. Here are some snow day ideas from a blogger mom Jenn at Frugal Upstate. She has her schnitzel together.

Hey, I did master the first one.

• Stay in your PJ’s all day
• Make homemade play dough
• Make homemade finger paints
• Build a fort of old boxes & sofa cushions
• Build a tent with a sheet.
• Watch old musicals like Singing In the Rain.
• Have an indoor picnic.
• Make Bread-for extra fun let the kids “sculpt” with the dough-their creations can be baked & eaten
• Bake Cookies-I like these shaped gingerbread cookies because they don’t have to chill, but drop or bar cookies are fun too.
• Make snow “ice cream”
• Make maple syrup “candy” with snow (ala Little House on the Prairie!)
• Have a taffy pull
• Make maple syrup/honey snow cones!
• Make chocolate covered pretzels (or chocolate covered whatever you have in the pantry-it all tastes good w/chocolate!)
• Bring a baby pool inside with snow to play and make snow castles.
• Curl up on the couch with a hot cup of tea (or hot chocolate) and read a good book. Or two. Or three.
• Make homemade soft pretzels, like from the mall.
• Write letters to anyone from Grandma to your congressman.
• Play board games. Maybe have a tournament.
• Play card games.
• Do “Snow Art”-use small snowballs as paintbrushes with watercolors. Note-a trash bag under the paper saves you a lot on cleanup!
• Play video or computer games.
• Make a torn paper mosaic
• Feed you birdy friends by stringing popcorn to hang on a tree or making a pine cone birdfeeder.
• Make paper mache bowls. (note-this tutorial uses a pumpkin instead of a balloon. You can use the same cling wrap technique on another bowl instead)
• Color on some free printable coloring pages.
• Let the kids choose the dinner menu and have them help you cook.
• Have a pretend fashion shoot.
• Make some toys and models with free printable paper crafts from Canon. (note: trust me, there are things for teens on here-the copy of the Russian church with onion domes is gorgeous & complex)
• Make paper beads.
• Make melted crayon art.
• Make new crayons from some old ones.
• Have a snowball fight!!!
• Make a snowman.
• Make snow angels.
• Go snowshoeing or cross country skiing.
• Build a snow fort.
• Go sledding. No sled, no worries! Go cardboard sledding.
• Play some snow games.

Making paper beads sounds like a special kind of torture, but I’ll take snow ice cream for a spin!  Happy winter!

Snow Cream Recipe
Ingredients
4 cups fresh snow
1 cup cream or milk
¾ cup sugar
1 tsp vanilla extract
Instructions
Mix it all together and eat it

Relocating can induce feelings of great optimism and adventure.  A fresh start!  It can also be a stressful time.  We understand how change affects our human family members, but we may overlook ways we can make moving pets less stressful.

Like people, the hardship that arises from moving is generally based around anxiety. It is key to help your pet feel as secure as possible.  Dogs typically adjust more quickly than cats.  They are usually more socialized and used to new smells and people.  Before moving introduce your cat to her carrier and make the space as comfortable as possible.  Leave the door open and give your cat some time to familiarize  with the space.  If you are moving a long distance, start by taking your cat on short drives in a carrier to familiarize her with car travel.  For dogs, try to keep them involved in moving activities. Isolating them can make them feel more nervous.  If you aren’t moving too far away try to take your dog to your new house a couple of times to familiarize them with the smells of the home and new neighborhood.

On the day of your big move cats should be confined to their carrier to avoid losing them in all of the commotion. People coming in and out of the house provides the perfect opportunity for a nervous cat to escape the chaos.  Dogs may do better away from the activity.  If a friend or family member can watch the dog in a calm environment it would be best.  It is always encouraged to have your pets wear collars and tags with your updated contact information.  I love the combination reflective collars with slide on tags.  This is most important during the moving process and once you’re settling into your new location.  Pets can get spooked on the journey and find themselves in an area they are unsure of navigating.  They may even try to find their way back to the home you’ve just left.

Once you’ve made it to your new home, it’s important to maintain your pet’s schedule. Like people, furry friends find comfort in routine.  Feed them at their regular time.  Take dogs on lots of walks and familiarize them with their surroundings.  Sticking to the same route in the beginning can help your dog adjust.

Along with finding the best doctor, dentist, schools, and childcare for your family you will also be looking for a veterinarian for your pets.  Cesar Milan has provided some tips on choosing a vet that fits your pet’s needs.  Once you’ve find a vet you may want to ask them for recommendations on pet sitters, dog walkers and boarding facilities.

Here’s a quick story of what NOT to do when moving pets. Do not put your cat in a carrier in the front of your moving truck, then after 8 hours of driving slide on ice all the way down your new driveway in the moving truck, over the side of the mountain.  Definitely do not land on the 500 gallon propane tank, jump out of the truck window, lose a shoe and run while leaving your partner to crawl back through the window to get the cat.  Try to avoid being evacuated by the local fire department. Taking your dog (who was riding in the car following the moving truck) and cat to sleep at the La Quinta for the night is not as fun as it sounds.  Trust me.

Every December I have three goals: to stay healthy, to refrain from drinking too much and to avoid incarceration. Seems simple enough? It never works. December starts out easily enough. Everyone is happy and cheerful, but by the end of the month it’s family time. My family drives over 2,400 miles between Christmas and New Year’s Day so that no one feels excluded.  This often ends in an emotional breakdown (me), loads of drunken foolishness (me) and an influenza-like virus (me + at least one other loved one).

I’m the last person who should be giving tips on remaining mentally and physically healthy over the holidays, but I’ve been doing some research. Pay attention to the amount of alcohol you consume. Alcohol flows freely at potentially awkward social functions and pressure filled family gatherings. That eggnog is just so tempting! Overindulging in alcohol can lead to a weakened immune system and loads of regrets.  People don’t forget when you flash your coworker’s husband at the office holiday party.  Trust me.

Always remember that you can say no. You don’t have to go to every holiday gathering or travel up and down the eastern side of the country in an attempt to please people. You have the right to enjoy the holidays the way you want.

Getting plenty of sleep, eating healthy food and staying active can be a lifesaver for your brain and your immune system. Schedule some time and relaxation for yourself. Try to anticipate stress that may come your way during the holidays and have a plan. If you know you tend to get overwhelmed at family gatherings give yourself the option to go on a walk and keep on walkin’ to the bus stop if it feels right.

Most importantly, wipe things. Wipe plane seats and rest area door knobs. Wipe your kids and wash your hands.  Focus on fun and not perfection. Pace yourself, know your limits and enjoy your loved ones. Happy Holidays!

PS-Don’t worry about the incarceration part. We’ll discuss that a different time.

It’s the time of year where we shower loved ones, and ourselves, with fun presents!  Getting good deals isn’t hard to do between Thanksgiving and Christmas, but if you’re like me you’ll only be online shopping. To find the VERY best deals I scan through the website Hip2Save a few times per day.  A woman named Collin and her support team post deals that they have found or others have submitted throughout the day. Most of their posts direct you to shop on sites like Amazon, Target and Kohl’s. They are also couponing experts!  I have zero patience for couponing, but if someone posts links to coupons or codes and spells out how to use them I’m game.  Other daily deal websites include FatWallet and DailySteals.

If you have to feel good about the money you’re spending I suggest you check out Etsy or Ten Thousand Villages. Ten Thousand Villages is a fair trade marketplace that sells items like jewelry and decor from communities throughout the developing world.  You get to learn about the makers of each items!  I LOVE it!  It’s the one store where being a materialistic slob makes me feel good about myself!  Ten Thousands Villages also has stores all over the country.  Ten Thousands Villages stores in North Carolina are located in Asheville, Cary, Chapel Hill, Montreat and Greensboro.  No matter what you’re looking for we can all agree that there are major benefits of online shopping. Aside from fat pants and saving money you get to avoid strangers and never leave your bed. Happy shopping!

Charlotte area holiday lights

Daniel Stowe Botanical Garden. Santa, trees, lights, carriage rides, warm beverages and music. November 18- January 1. Belmont, NC. Check website for hours and prices. dsbg.org

The town of McAdenville. The whole town lights up!  Officially lighting is December 1 and goes through December 26. McAdenville, NC. FREE! Check website for hours. mcadenville-christmastown.com

Charlotte Motor Speedway. 3,000,000+ lights, Santa, carriage rides, food, movies and music. November 19-December 31. Concord, NC. Check website for hours and prices. charlottemotorspeedway.com

Holidays at the Hall. Breakfast with Santa, visiting from the Hall of Fame mascot, ice skating with theme days, lights on the tree and plaza. NASCAR Hall of Fame Plaza. Charlotte, NC. Check website for hours and prices. holidaysatthehall.com

Hometown Holiday and Holiday Tree Lighting. Crafts, activities, entertainment and a tree lighting. Tree light December 3. Matthews, NC. FREE! matthewsnc.gov

Fourth Ward Holiday Home Tour. Take a self-guided tour through decorated historical homes, carriage rides and choirs. December 2-4. Charlotte, NC. Check website for prices. fofw.org

Asheville, Hickory and High Country holiday lights

Christmas at Biltmore. Over 70 decorated Christmas tree, Christmas wine at the winery and a seasonal menu in the restaurant. November 4-January 8. Asheville, NC. Check website for prices. christmas.biltmore.com

Hickory Tree lighting.  The Mayor will kick off the Holiday Season with a holiday tree lighting ceremony in Union Square. Shops will be open. Hickory, NC. Check website for schedule of holiday events. downtownhickory.com

Light up the town in West Jefferson! Lighting of the entire town at dusk, extended business hours, food specials, live entertainment and prizes. West Jefferson, NC. FREE. Check website for schedule of holiday events. visitwestjefferson.org/

Blowing Rock Christmas in the Park and Tree Lighting. Santa, hot chocolate,music and entertainment! Memorial Park. Blowing Rock, NC. FREE. Check website for schedule of holiday events. blowingrock.com

Boone Tree Lighting.  The annual lighting of the downtown Boone Christmas Tree is at the Jones House followed by First Friday. Additional events at Mast General Store and the library. December 2. Boone, NC. Visit website for hours. downtownboonenc.com

Chetola Resort Festival of Lights. Carriage rides, cookie decorating, Santa visits, kids camp.
Blowing Rock, NC. Check website for schedule of holiday events. chetola.com/thanksgiving.html

Banner Elk Tree Lighting. Menorah and tree lighting. Showing of the movie Elf.
December 2. Banner Elk, NC. FREE.

If holiday lights aren’t enough to get you in the spirit maybe you just need to get lit…

SPARKLING CRANBERRY SANGRIA RECIPE

 INGREDIENTS
3 cups fresh cranberries, divided
1 cup orange juice
½ cup granulated sugar
¾ cup brandy
1 (750 ml) bottle sweet white wine
1 (750 ml) bottle sparkling wine, chilled
1 orange, sliced
INSTRUCTIONS
In a medium pot, add 2 cups of cranberries, the orange juice, and sugar. Place over medium heat and cook, stirring occasionally, for 15 minutes, until all of the cranberries have burst open. You may need to reduce the heat to low once the cranberries start bursting as the liquid will become frothy and could bubble over.
Remove the pot from the heat and let cool for 5 minutes. Stir the brandy to the cranberry mixture. Transfer to the refrigerator to chill for 2 hours.
Pour the brandy mixture into a large bowl through a fine mesh strainer. Discard the cranberry pulp.
Transfer the sweetened cranberry brandy to a serving pitcher. Add the sliced orange and 1 cup of fresh cranberries. Add the white wine (not sparkling) to the pitcher. Stir. Refrigerate for at least 2 hours.
Just before serving, add the chilled sparkling wine.